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In honor of Miss Cupcake's post from yesterday, here are a few Parent Dance pics. We didn't have anything special -- just a song and a quartet of parents (we switched halfway). But I enthusiastically recommend a Parent Dance to everyone -- a few minutes out of the reception can mean a lifetime's worth of bonding moments all around.
(Photos, as always, by Punam Bean)
As the Tulip Nuptial Recap Extravaganza winds down, I'm still discovering the occasional forgotten detail. And the current case in point is actually one of my favorite decorations from our wedding reception:
As a cheapskate budget bride, I've always loved the decorative-bang-for-few-bucks factor of the famous Martha Stewart tissue poufs. In fact, I bought some red tissue and planned to do up poufs for our own decor. But between illness and general laziness, few things get done in my world. And in the end ... well, let's just say our red-tissue-paper needs will be met for many Christmases to come!
Luckily I also picked up a dozen of these beauties, which hung from the ceiling in our cocktail area. Assembly took approximately two seconds -- just unfold the rice-paper accordion around the circle and secure it with a bit of tape or the included paper clip. I adored them for some crazy reason, whether because of the bright turquoise color or my love for vintage accordion-paper party decorations (Santa's belly, anyone?). Available at Luna Bazaar, they come in 5 colors and are $1.50 for the 14" model and $1.95 for an 18-incher (less if you buy a dozen or more).
What other simple paper decorations can be used to jazz up a celebration site? Anyone going with paper flags or streamers? Or the genuine Martha floral poms?
Because Mr T and I didn't live together pre-wedding, we're in the midst of all the little transitions couples encounter when moving in together for the first time. Right now we're celebrating birthdays a few weeks apart, and that seems to have driven home the new lack of privacy.
We haven't combined finances yet, so it wasn't hard to hide the actual purchase of Mr T's gift. But I was napping when FedEx dropped it at our door. And, as hard as he tried not to read the shipping label, the word Roku was written on the box in big, bright letters! A well-designed box, but ... element of surprise? Not so much.
And we always get a Ben & Jerry's ice cream cake for our birthdays. So there's no real surprise there. But is the magic nearly gone if I've already handed him the "20% off B&J cakes" coupon that I came across in our latest Val-Pak coupon mailer?
I fear we're already just one step away from those boring married-couple combined gifts.... (And, well, Christmas is starting to look like a really good excuse to replace our ancient refrigerator!)
For you that live together and/or are already married, how do you manage to keep the magic alive at gift-giving time? What other little transitions have you had to face, post move-in?
Unless you give her free reign to pick the dress, let's face facts. She will NOT wear it again. So if it's going to be a one-off, why not buy something as inexpensive as possible?
Today Creature Comforts had a feature on when to save and when to splurge for weddings, and her illustration included a bridesmaid dress from Forever21. Brilliant!!
If your ladies can rock a short skirt (the longest of these models is only 33" from the shoulder, warns the Amazon...), there are some surprisingly great options.
(It's red, it's silk, and it's $30. And I love the modern style of this $23 satin sheath.)
(Picture this $20 beauty with killer heels at a vintage-themed wedding. This basic v-neck with a lovely back comes in 5 colors and is only $13.50.)
With prices like that, they might even have money left over for a clutch ($16) and some jewelry ($5 and $4).
As always, let's hear the shout-outs to your own favorite wedding bargains!
Weddings, everyone. We're discussing weddings! Sheesh.
(A wedding party half the size of our entire wedding. Image source)
For Mr T and me, our main purpose in throwing a wedding party was to gather loved ones from our many phases of life (growing up, college, grad school, jobs in various states and countries). It's probably the only chance we'll ever have to bring everyone to town at once, and we wanted to take full advantage. But we're the type with a few close friends as opposed to a massive social circle, and we were conscious of travel expenses for such a scattered group. So, invitations went to around 80 people, with maybe 50 attending.
As it turned out, this small wedding was the best decision we made. I'll never forget walking down the aisle, catching sight of faces in the crowd, and feeling so much love for each and every one of them. (Though unfortunately it meant I forgot to look at Mr T for his big reaction moment -- urf!) Having everyone close heightened the sense of community -- people were thrilled for us, happy to chip in and help create the day, interested in getting to know one another better. And they all know us so well that there was no one to impress.
That said, I have had friends who saw their wedding as a celebration for the community at large. Inviting absolutely everyone can increase your joy in different ways.
(Note you're in for interesting discussions if you and your intended see this point differently! I'll never forget the description by a groom who wanted a small wedding of negotiating this process with his bride, who was from Africa and believed the more, the merrier. He: "We can't invite that person. He's not our friend! He doesn't even have friends!" She: "Well, isn't that so much more reason to invite him??")
What got me onto this topic was a post on the issue of size and budgets at A Practical Wedding (my new favorite "other-than-Weddingbee" wedding blog), which pointed out that expert types always say reducing your guest list is the best possible way to reduce wedding costs. Having been there, I agree with that the answer is ... yes and no.
A smaller size cuts your food and beverage budger, without question. Also favors, chair rentals, centerpieces, invitations, and anything else where you pay by the piece. On a more philosophical level, I believe we saved a lot because we didn't feel the need to impress.
On the other hand, many wedding costs are fixed. You're going to pay the same for your dress, bouquet, site fee, music, photographer, etc., whether you have 3 guests or 300. So your expenditures per guest actually should be smaller at a big wedding.
No answers here. Just thought I'd put the topic out there for discussion.... What are your thoughts on big vs small weddings?
You know how people often have a strange talent they're much too proud of? My personal skill is knowing inexpensive sources for everything. So I'm always a bit horrified to come across a source I've never heard of -- shakes the whole mental foundation....
Such was my reaction in seeing a Nicole Lee Collection evening bag in a recent issue of Brides. The price they listed was 30-odd dollars. But it's now on sale for $7.50!
Even their high-end evening bags are under $40:
And where was this $7.50 model when my mother needed a bronze bag for our wedding day?
Did you people know about this? What other fabulously inexpensive resources (bridal or otherwise) might I be missing out on? Please share!!
Wedding toasts by my mother and our BM & MOH ... time spent writing them.
MOH reading excerpts of a 12-year-old letter describing my "perfect man" ... hours poring over old letters.
Reaction shots? ... Priceless!
Love this glowing shot of my mother!
(Photos by Punam Bean)
Wedding favors can be a touchy issue. Brides love them, but realistically non-edibles often get tossed out after the wedding. (Whether right away or, if you're like me, after you've kept them for a few months because you feel guilty throwing out a friend's favor!)
Each sachet cost about 80 cents but looked much nicer, thanks to the embroidered bags. And they were a huge hit with the females in attendance -- a few gals admitted to taking a handful! Hopefully, our guests' drawers will now smell pretty for many months to come....
From the start, I planned to save funds by DIYing our wedding flowers. Martha Stewart's DVDs, which I checked out from our local library, made it look amazingly easy. But I had nightmares about trying to wire together bouquets on the busy day before the wedding.
So, we went with silk flowers for our bouquets and bouts, purchased months in advance from Save-on-Crafts. And I was quite impressed -- they were high quality at excellent prices.
These orchid boutonnieres were only $1.44 each. (Though we had to purchase a 24-pack for that price -- there were definitely extras!) We replaced the original white ribbon with red to match our color scheme.
The girls' orchid bouquets were from the same source.
For my own bouquet, I again took advantage of the silk-flower savings to purchase a beloved flower that's pricey when real -- in this case, peonies! The bouquet was filled out with roses for contrast.
(Peonies from Save-on-Crafts were $2.79 for red, $3.49 for white. Roses were $1-4, depending on size.)
But I was slow in deciding what to do about centerpieces. And FMIL expressed a strong preference in favor of real flowers for the mothers' corsages. So, a couple of weeks before the wedding, I was back online in search of live flowers.
We ended up purchasing through an online wholesaler called FiftyFlowers. And I highly recommend them. The flowers were beautiful at prices lower than the other sources I checked. Their customer service was fantastic -- they phoned to recommend a change to our delivery date so the lilies would open by the time of the wedding, and they called again with reassurance when FedEx had to deliver a day late. The eco-girl in me feels guilty about flying them in, but logistically it's pretty amazing that they were in the ground in South America one day and at my house the next!!
We purchased 100 stems of red Peruvian Lilies and 50 white Anastasia roses, for $110 each.
I found the lilies to be slightly disappointing in terms of color. That may be what happens when you order sight-unseen off the Web, but then again I've heard many stories where brides received something unexpected from their florists. Maybe that's just how it goes with flowers.... Here's the color of the real thing, versus the photo above:
But the roses were specacular -- enormous, snowy, and completely glorious. Rather than cutting them down into vases, we left them in enormous long-stemmed bouquets for tables at the ceremony and reception buffet. Sadly, no photo, but trust me on this one if you're in the market for roses!
Overall, I was surprised by how long the fresh flowers survived. We received the lilies on Wednesday and the roses on Thursday so they would be open for our Saturday wedding. In fact, they peaked the day after the wedding, and both types remained beautiful for several days thereafter. So, a note to DIY brides -- if you buy flowers that are tightly closed, you may be surprised how far in advance you can make the purchase.
In the end, I loved the ease of silk but the vibrant freshness of the real flowers. Each has its benefits for DIY brides. And, when in doubt, you can always mix and match!
Are you planning to "DIY" your wedding flowers? Will they be real or silk?
While Mr T and I were playing model in Old Town Alexandria, a few of the guests were at Teaism decorating for the big party. (Yes, we put our guests to work!!!)
The reception space was spare and modern, so it didn't require over-the-top decorating. We hung paper lanterns in our wedding colors and scattered Ikea tealights, chocolates, and flowers in small, square dollar-store vases. The wonderful friend who served as Decorator-in-Chief also employed a favorite budget trick that goes a long way -- separating a handful of roses into individual petals and scattering them around the tables.
(A favorite votive holder imported from home)
In a small space, the food itself can add a significant amount of decorative style. Especially when there are lots of tempting desserts!
In fact, there were so many desserts that we made bags for guests to take cookies home. We used the Chinese lantern design from the front of our invitations, some white paper bags from the food section at Michaels, and our trusty Gocco -- the whole project took less than an hour. And it must have been a success because, while we ate leftover cake and cupcake for weeks (orange ginger buttercream frosting, mmmmm), there wasn't a leftover cookie in sight!
Teaism has two levels, so we held the cocktail hour upstairs before everyone moved down for dinner and (what would have been) dancing. It was fun to have an actual staircase for the grand entrance:
People made themselves comfortable whereever they pleased (thank heavens, no seating arrangements to figure out). And then, party time!
(All photos by Punam Bean)
What are your favorite budget-decor ideas? Anyone else putting your guests on Decor Duty??
